Ramblings of Ash

Boxes within boxes within black boxes within boxes within..

April 1, 2025

what even is a fucking box? a square, four sides, 90 degree angles? or is it just a concept created to torture me?

if you, gentle reader, have ever taken a journey down webmaster lane, you probably know exactly what the hell I'm talking about. Its all just boxes within boxes within another. fucking. box. and trying to figure out what exactly needs a box and what can just be thrown into a box? laugh all you want (cause i'll laugh with you) but, it has taken me DAYS to figure out a simple two column+header layout. yeah, i could've just copied a free layout from somewhere or use the wonderful sadgrl layout creator, but the wisdom of my college professor (we'll name him Stewart) stays in my head to this day. the wisdom and dangers of the ~black box~

so much that we do in our lives is just putting an input into a system to get an output but so little do we know the mechanisms that run the system, the black box. now this isn't some "boomer yells at cloud" moment, though Stewart 1000% meant it to be that moment as even though he is a wealth of information and sarcasm, problematic is additionally an apt descriptor. black boxes are physical, not just digital. do you know how your fridge works? (well its probably running and you should go catch it heuheuheu)

black boxing my way through it all defeats the purpose. not to say the black box isn't useful. what's the point of reinventing the box, right? like i'm not out here going to be coding a whole guestbook or some shit. but i'll definitely code the boxes, even if i want to bash my head against the wall.

are you also bashing your head up against a wall?

linkies that helped me that could help you:

• this program REALLY helped me visualize ~*the box*~
• websites to actually learn HTML/CSS from the ground up. a lot of it i already knew from my ~*'younger years'*~ but a refresher was needed (and i learned a lot more stuff!) the W3 Schools website was especially nice with the "Try It" examples ❤ [1, 2, 3]
• browser based HTML/CSS/JS editor

on a more personal note, i asked my partner yesterday what their life goal was. be materially comfortable enough to make music, play video games, and be as lazy as possible. *very* him indeed, the absolute hendonist ❤ i asked him what he thought *my* life goal would be and the immediate response, absolutely read, just end me: you haven't really had the time to think about what that is, have you? HAHAHAHAHA. i might go into the context of the answer later but i wont bore you now, reader. ive been thinking about that ever since. i think my life goal is to simply just experience life. i have so many smaller goals though: mastering webmastering, keep building my silly little dollhouses, start the laborious task of collecting media i like (both physical and digital). it goes on. do i, or you, truly need a bigger plan than to just live?

Devil Zukin's Decentralization of Webspace

March 28, 2025

starting my journey into de-centralized webspace in the year of our lord 2025 feels like im arriving to the party late, lol. all these wonderful websites that popped off in 2020-2023 seem dead or abandoned. not that i havent found spots that are still active. just sad to see that it seemed to just be a fad for some. at least thats my assumption. who knows where the webmasters for all these places.

im not new to this.. let's say "type" of internet (i want to refrain from "era" to emphasis my entrance into de-centralized webspace is not due to pure nostalgia, even if it is a small influence). bAcK iN mY dAy, i used to have such fun making my own websites, customizing my MySpace page, discussing on forums, and the like. yes, i miss that and thats where the nostalgia really comes in. but its not my main reason for my foray into this space. no, modern internet, or what the yesterweb movement called the "core web", feels empty and disingenuous. i could go on in length about why this is but the tldr is as such:

early internet was a replacement for the erosion of real world third spaces (at least in the western world; im american thus my experience is rooted there). its obviously up for debate if this was a good or bad replacement. the movement for a more de-centralized webspace (think yesterweb) was trying to alleviate the lack of real world third spaces, which have continued to erode even further since the days of the early internet. modern internet feels as it does (and is no longer a suitable replacement for real world third spaces) because of the commodification of every inch and corner of it. similar to real world third spaces, capitalism piecemeals the world (real and virtual) so those with capital can further profit, all at the expense of those with no capital.

so thats why im here, starting my journey in relearning HTML/CSS. as a stance against what capitalism has taken from us. as a way to connect with others outside of the sphere of advertisements and consumerism and so on. to de-centralize my webspace.

now if you got this far, you probably think of me as this haughty, big ideas type. trust me, i am. but only like 45% of the time. the other 55%? im a shit-poster, meme-er, sarcastic, dead-pan humor type. and thats what this space is going to be. 55% shit post, 45% big ideas. WELCOME TO ZUKIN PALACE