who is meetoothanks?

real pic of meetoothanks

hello fellow internet scrub. name's meetoothanks or ash. whichever you prefer, though i've gone by many names and internet personas that have been lost to the sands of time (if you know who dafreak9000 is, how did you find me).

i'm your local internet wizard here to bring some whimsy into your life. but not in a fantasical D&D wizard type of way. or 90's witchy whimsy Practical Magic and Hocus Pocus-esque way (even though that is one of my favorite vibes). no, think of a banana floating in dark hallway that somehow always has a spotlight on it or the happy-go-lucky stranger there to guide you through the backrooms and reassure you that the scaryman following you is actually a really great guy and has a terrible poker face.

i've been chronically online since i first gained consciousness (circa 2006) though, thankfully, its not terminal as long as i occasionally touch grass. what is terminal is the cat brainrot. i cannot stop consuming lil cat memes.

my daytime hours are usually spent saving the environment and listening to a constant recitation of the communist manifesto. nighttime hours are usually spent trying to to decide what to eat for dinner and watching Sims 1 longplay no commentary youtube videos.

what you'll see here on this page and around the entire website is essentially my internet persona. is it different than my irl self? not much. only big change is im a certified yapper irl, not as much online, lolol.

quick facts

pronouns: they/she
age: ancient elder (early-30s)
location: Chicago, USA
occupation: scientist

slow facts

ex theater kid turned emo kid (but in reality emo kids are theater kids)
humor is my lifeforce and i like it either dry or silly (i probably meme too much)
i go feral for a good spreadsheet